This could turn into one of my most raw posts I’ve ever created. I’m not being overly dramatic about the subject and it might prove carthatic in writing it.
It’s about adoption. And this is a continuation of the previous blog (below blog fans!)
So back in 2019, I was out of official options I suppose about what to do, or where to look for my birth family.
When I first approached the Adoption Society that dealt with my adoption in 1973, I was told to not use social media to go looking….
Well…
What else could I do?
So, I posted on a few Local groups on socialmedia, asking if anyone knew of this family, and I gave some idea of location, and family tree. Didn’t have much luck to start, but then I had a response saying, the name I’d given, it could be one person, or another. They tagged another person into the post. And nervously, I started to see a birth family coming through.
Over the course of the next week or so, I discovered I had other siblings – two sisters, and two brothers, of which I am the eldest of the five.
Initially I was talking to an Aunty and one of my sisters, and in turn started a slow conversation with my birth mother.
This is where I suppose this story stutters a little. As much as you can imagine, I’m not going into the full detail of my family, needless to say as far as I could tell, not all the family were aware of me, although my sister did mention when she was in school, a brother was spoken about – but that’s where it was kind of left.
The slow conversation with my BM was across text, but I eventually got the courage to call her, at a predetemined time, as I’ve previously alluded to in this very post, not all the family knew about me, so I suppose I had to tread carefully.
This is what I mean when I talk about the idea of the strange concept of protecting your birth parents. You feel you need to tread careful, avoid blurting things out, for fear it would blow up! I often refer to this as not wanting to light the blue touch paper, as I feel I’m an unexploded bomb ready to blow the family apart.
Again, this is where this blog series comes into play, for me to fully understand what I mean, and to not have the whole thing “on my shoulders”.
As has been mentioned recently, these blogs are my truth. In being adopted, I didn’t sign up to have to shoulder this burden, a burden which I think a lot of adoptees might recognize.
And that’s where I’ll leave this blog, till the next time.
Thanks for checking me out.